A Child Of Atom

Yesterday I settled in on the A train for my normal afternoon commute. I automatically scanned the car for interesting people to sketch and landed on a young lady across the aisle from me. After a few minutes of observing her I noticed a couple things: first she was not going to be still enough for me to sketch. She was very active, bouncing in conversation between her younger sister and a young man that I assume to be her boyfriend. The second thing I noticed was that she had some seriously bad teeth. They were white, and all in place, but they seemed to be too big and they stuck out at weird angles, to the point of distorting her upper lip a bit. I couldn't help but to continue looking up at her. I wanted to get a good look at what was going on in her mouth. After a few seconds she laughed deeply and opened her mouth really widely. It was then that I saw the source of everything... her canines were HUGE! About that time her boyfriend reacted to the same joke and let out a loud laugh I glanced at him and realized... so were his.

I took a second took a longer look at them. Both dressed entirely in black. Both had silver jewelry on and she was wearing a silver ankh pendent. He had long black fingernails that looked to be filed to a point. She was wearing a deep blood red lipstick. And they had fangs. Serious, dental application fangs, not the cheap plastic ones you get around Halloween. I was sitting across from two vampires.

Other than the teeth, it was subtle. They didn't look overly "goth-y." No heavy eyeliner or white face makeup. They hadn't even dyed their hair deep black. They were just... average run of the mill vampires. Nothing odd about that, right?

Dramatis Personae
Our Hero (A cute (but modest) man recovering from a staggeringly good Christmas day)
Kid Flash (Handsome, tall, runner type, boyfriend to our Hero)

The Scene
After a holiday party, in a dark apartment with the Christmas tree in the background, and a few wrapping paper scraps still scattered about.

Act 1, Scene 1
Kid Flash: There's one more present to unwrap.
Our Hero: Really? How is that possible?

Kid Flash retrieves a small Altoids tin wrapped in pink ribbon from a nearby bookshelf and hands it to Our Hero.

OH: What's this?

KF smiles slightly mysteriously as OH unwraps to discover two shiny new keys to KF's apartment.

KF: I'm not sure what it means, or if it means anything, or if it even needs to mean anything, but I thought it was time.
OH: Thank you. All it has to mean is that you're tired of waiting by the buzzer to let me in.
KF: Well... let's say it means more than that.

They kiss as the lights fade.

THE END

What an AMAZING holiday. I woke up this morning snuggled up close to Kid Flash trying to forget the lack of sleep that I had had. (We'll not discuss the live salsa band that was playing in the alley by his apartment building until nearly 4 a.m....UGH!) KF's friends quickly joined us for a breakfast of scrambled eggs with cheese, mushrooms, and sun dried tomatoes, accompanied by a killer coffee cake that is tradition in KF's family. That was followed by a leisurely day of laying about in our pj's reading children's books and having a great time. We all tried to be very patient as we waited for KF's brother and his boyfriend to arrive so that we could get to the gifts and the actual merriment. In the meantime we listened to Christmas music by Squirrel Nut Zippers, The Muppets and John Denver, and the Cocteau Twins. I introduced everyone to the joy that was the Star Wars Christmas Special and the Star Wars Christmas Album. Around 3 everyone was finally accounted for and we began the present bonanza!



I received 1) The Visible Woman 2) A Tenorikuma tea towel 3) The Visible Man 4) Some Roller Derby posters 5) A Star Wars folder, 6) The Pop-up Book of Sex (uhm... Mark? Can we discuss the reasoning behind giving me a book of heterosexual sexual positions?) 7) Wooden Spoons, 8) The Lives of Shadows 9) I Am Not Myself These Days 10) Some 70% (!!) Dark Chocolate 11) Some "Elves Gone Wild" Christmas cards 12) Four quarts of Duke's Mayonnaise (he learned pretty quick, didn't he?) 13) Rachael Ray's Comfort Foods cook book 14) The Ultimate Head Massager 15) A new Moleskine (you can always use extras) 16) Some Cosmic Glitter Glue (with space debris!) 17) Hong Kong Comics postcards, 18) My Life, by Iris Dement, 19) A bottle of Dijonaisse 20) Some Red Pepper Balsamic Vinegar Sauce 21) A Tenorikuma rolling stamper 22) A super cute plate with pink piggies on it and 23) a drawing pen.

There's also still gifts in the mail somewhere from my mom and sister, and my gift to myself, a new MacBook dual core 2.0 GHz, with 1 GB memory and an 80 GB hard drive, which should be arriving on Thursday. (Yay!! I'll finally be able to see my monitor again! And have enough memory to run CS2!)

All in all a fabulous Holiday. I hope yours was as well.

Happy Holiday, no matter your flavor!

To go with yesterday's post...

Have you ever wondered what goes on in the head of a department store Santa? Well, one of my fiends is doing just that this year. But he's not just any old Santa, he's a Macy's Santa. Check his blog here for the inside scoop.

Oh, and be prepared to cry a little.

Here's what the fat-man has to say about me: "Nice, but has naughty lapses. High marks in the good deeds department. Better than average manners. Hopefully, thoughtfulness will continue to be as good as last month. Neatness needs improvement!"

What does he have to say about you?

Okay... I resisted for a year now. I figured that I already belonged to Friendster so why should I bother joining MySpace? I finally caved though... I can't take TOO much peer pressure... so if you are so inclined come be my friend.

(10 extra net-culture points if you get the reference in the title.)

Andrea writes: "I was wondering - have you ever taken life drawing classes? What is your opinion on them?"

Andrea, yes I have taken figure drawing classes, quite a number of them. Zdzislaw Sikora, the most infamous life drawing instructor on the Eastern Seaboard, taught me figure drawing nearly every semester for 3 years. Beyond that I've taken a half dozen other classes from other teachers as well. Obviously I am a firm believer in it. The human figure is the source of all good things in art. If you know how to accurately convey the human form you can do anything I believe. Architecture is based on our proportions, we share musculature and form with animals, (and even plants), our skin alone is a study in color theory, not even getting into eyes and hair, and if you can capture emotion or attitude in a figure drawing... well... that's just art at it's most sublime. Even if all you ever do is the most abstract of works it's my opinion that having a grounded basis in drawing the human form would be helpful, and would inform your work.

Now, having said all that... do I think that classes are necessary per se? Mmmmm... no. Like most things it can be learned through self study. There are hundreds of good books and other resources out there to help you learn. There is however something ineffable about being in a class, a dozen or so people all focused on the same subject, and the same lesson is a pretty powerful experience when it works properly. A good teacher will be able to lead you through a series of understandings that will stick with you forever (check my words about Zdzislaw here.) Even a bad teacher may awaken a thing or two. (I won't name names but I still think about things I learned in one of my first college classes that were more based on my teacher's bad choices than her good ones.) There's also a lot to be said for the bonding that can occur between students in these situations. Think about how great it is looking at other people's versions of the EDM challenges, and then imagine being able to sneak a peek at them in progress, or to have direct access to the artist to ask questions with the pieces in front of you. It can be great.

This weekend was all about getting ready for the holiday. I've decided that I'm going to try to make as many of the gifts I'm giving this year as I can, partly out of money issues, and partly because it's just so much cooler. Saturday I was out and about picking up odds and ends of yarn, a belt buckle, some cloth, some thread, and a bunch of other cool crafty goodness. I won't be specific about what I'm making, or for who because some of them read the blog, but it's all pretty cool. I'll post some pictures after the holidays.

Kid Flash and I also picked up a tree for his apartment on Saturday night. We picked a very cute little short fat tree. On Sunday his friends came over and we spent the afternoon covering half his apartment in glitter and construction paper scraps as we made ornaments for the tree. It was like slipping back into childhood craft time, and it was great. A bunch of grown people sitting around a table covered in scissors, glue, sequins, glitter, pipe cleaners, and magic markers, arguing over the ribbons, and beads. There were a dozen or more snow flakes, a couple gingerbread men, a snowman or two, the classic construction paper chain, and lots of other cute ornaments generated. I made the topper for the tree, a Hello Kitty style angel. (I figured that was just sacrilegious enough.) Everyone was able to tap into their inner kid and produce some great ornaments. It's amazing how we never really forget how cool glitter glue and pipe cleaners can be, isn't it?

I'll be staying in town for the holidays because I have two shows opening in the week after New Years, so KF's tree will be the one that I'll be seeing the morning of the 25th. I have to say that it will be a cool tree to find my presents under, that's for sure.

I decided that for this month's 12 of 12 (Based on a project started by Chad Darnell.) that I'd stick to close-up shots.

Morning at my place.

Work begins. I had to do a few last minute draftings for one of the shows that I'm working on.

I also took a second or two to work on some of the side projects that I have going, including this doll that I'm making for a friend for Christmas.

Mid-day snack.

Back to work, this time on a graphic design project that I've been working on.

Another small break to put together a deck for tonight's card game. (I play VS. once a week... yes, I' a geek.)

Out the door for the rest of my day.

This afternoon's project? Finishing up costume measurements for the OTHER show.

I passed this on the street and couldn't pass it up.

My evening snack, while playing cards.

At the game. (By the way... my deck didn't work very well. I got STOMPED.)

Wrapping up the day the way I started it, only with my secondary toothbrush (at Kid Flash's house.)

Okay... I'm a bad blogger. I've been meaning to update and add these photos all week but life just exploded when I got back to the city. While I was way one of the shows that I'm working on lost it's costume designer and they asked me to take up the design! Great news for me, but that means that I am designing both sets and costumes for two different shows that both open within a week of each other. That the equivalent of 4 shows worth of work! Regardless I decided that since I was uploading my "12 of 12" for yesterday that I would finally upload these as well. Enjoy!

One of the most frequent questions I get about my subway sketches is whether anyone ever notices me or objects to what I'm doing. Well it's in San Fran, not NYC but I offer this as proof that no one pays attention to or is bothered by ANYTHING that might happen while on public transport:



If the embedded file above doesn't work you can see the movie here.

Looking over my hit logs for the time while I was away I'm noticing an odd trend... I've gotten several hits from google for the phrase "Christmas wishes" but they are all from outside the US (Lithuania, Poland, Italy, Turkey, the Philippines, Latvia, Belgium, Germany, the UK, France, Bulgaria, Slovakia, the Netherlands...). What is going on out there across the Atlantic?

Day 3 started early. My gracious host Berkley had to take his poor pomeranian to the vet which was semi-close to the airport so he agreed to drop me off there. My mom's flight in was at 9:20 at Bush Intercontinental and then we had to grab a rental car and get Houston Hobby by 11:30. After a false start at the car rental (the first car they gave us was too small) we were off!

Houston is NOT an easy city to navigate. There are lots of roads that don't seem to go where they should really, and not a lot of signage. There were several near misses of exits, and a little bit of arguing, but we made it to Hobby with time to spare. Mark and Kid Flash followed along pretty quickly and we grabbed some (truly awful) coffee and headed back to Bush to grab Michelle. On the way we found out that Michelle's plane was delayed. The winter weather that had swept through Houston the day before was wreaking havoc in St. Louis and had grounded the flight crew of her plane. She was going to be 2 hours late. There'd still be plenty of time if we could pull everything off perfectly.

The four of us had a leisurely lunch at a Middle Eastern place then swung by the gallery to check in and see if Jessica needed any last minute help. Jessica had hung the blow-ups and was starting to set up the tables and seemed to have everything in hand. After some advice about roads she suggested that I go ahead and take off even though it seemed like to me that we still had plenty of time. We arrived at the airport with time to spare again, so there was more sitting around and waiting for the flight to arrive.

We finally retrieved Michelle and got back on the highway at 5. I was supposed to be at the Gallery by 7. Even though we had done this trip once already we fell victim to poor signage and ended up on the wrong highway which was just a parking lot full of traffic. Turning around getting back to the correct road and then fighting traffic into town took over an hour. We checked into the hotel at 6:15. I rushed upstairs and into the shower while Kid Flash ironed my shirt and touched up my jeans. I was holding my breath the whole time and trying not to panic.

At 6:45 we were out of the hotel and onto the street again but the northbound lane, where we needed to be, was completely closed by construction! Now I panicked. Improvising a way to get between places and avoid traffic is easy if you are familiar with streets, or if the streets are laid out in a logical way, but in this case neither of those was true. With KF holding my hand and whispering in my ear to keep me calm I managed to navigate a way through it, but we didn't arrive at the gallery until 7:20.


As soon as we got to the gallery my nerves and apprehensions melted and I felt completely at ease. The show went off flawlessly. It was easy and comfortable to talk about my work and to meet the patrons who came through the gallery. I got to meet some great people who were truly interested and interesting. Some of the highlights included a former art teacher and her daughter who were a true pleasure to chat with. There were some members of the Everyday Matters chat group that were in the local area who came by, Kay and Sharon(you can see Sharon's reviews of the show here and here). Some members of the local art community came through, and several members of church that hosts the gallery. My friend Karen, who I met in my first year of college and who I haven't seen in over 8 years made the long drive over from Fort Worth which made me enormously happy. I tried very hard to chat with everyone who bought a piece and to tell them as much as I could remember about the people in the sketches, but I don't think I managed to catch everyone. Even still I talked more in that one evening than I have in months. My throat was dry and I was a bit hoarse before it was all done.

My Mom, Mark, Michelle and KF were all very gracious checked in with me on and off through the night. KF was great, he held me together in my panic before we got there, and he held my hand several times while I tried to gather my wits to chat with the patrons. Mark was in charge of the photography and took some great shots of everything. It meant more to me than I can say to have most of the important people in my life in one room, and it made the night go a lot easier. Especially considering that my mom and Michelle came from so far away and Michelle endured delays and bad travel to get there.

In the end it was one of the most enjoyable evenings I've had in a while. Besides my family I owe big debts of gratitude to everyone who came, to Jessica for arranging the whole event and convincing me that it would work in the first place, Eric for his ingenious hanging system, Berkley and Ann for hosting me and letting me run around town in their car, Ash for his DJ services, and everyone else at the gallery and at Ecclesia in general. Thanks to all of you!

After 4 hours at the gallery, the five of us, hungry and tired found a place to eat and then went back to the hotel to crash. My nerves and the tension and apprehension and all the talking and standing at the gallery equalled quite a wave of exhaustion.

The next morning greeted us with more travel worries. The flight that Mark, KF and I were supposed to be taking home was cancelled. Because of the rental car and Mama and Michelle being at the opposite airport, we ended up being stuck at Hobby for nearly 5 hours. Needless to say it was not enjoyable. Neither the Jetblue wireless, nor the wireless that is supposed to be available in the airport itself was working and the wing that our gate was in housed one small newsstand one restaurant and one bar. It was boring to the extreme, and the reason that this post is late!

I'm back in the city, with a brand new sketch book and ready to get started on the next show. (after a nap, okay?)

p.s. Look for more photos soon, I have a little editing work to get them to a showable point.

Okay... we got in from the gallery last night at nearly 2 after an evening of meeting, greeting and drinking wine!

I'll leave most of it until I get back to the city... but just as a quickie... the show was an enormous success! I was able to meet and greet the patrons from 7:30 to almost 11, the show didn't seem to want to end! Everyone just stayed and chatted. I sold 20 pieces already!

I am exhausted though. My voice is a bit weak this morning from talking so much last night and this little sleep is barely gonna hold me until I get to the airport.

Mark was in charge of the camera last night and he nearly filled a memory card with photos (over 200 shots!) so I'll edit those down and get them posted this afternoon. Look for a complete update later!

Last night I went to bed in the warm humidity of a Texas night. This morning I woke up in the arctic. Yesterday's high was 80. When I checked the weather to prep for this trip the high today was supposed to be 55. In actuality it never got above 35. Needless to say I didn't pack for this.

I had most of the morning to myself so I decided to try on my outfit for tomorrow. No, I hadn't done it before. Yes, I understand that I should have. I saw immediately that parts of it weren't going to work. The tux jacket primarily was a problem. It was double breasted, which I hadn't realized, so the all important vest would have been covered. So I set out to find a new jacket. My quest took me to several places, but the best choice was at the Gap, so that's what i ended up with. It's cute, a textured wool with epaulets, it will look great with the vest.


Afterwards I went to the gallery and put together the hanging rigs for the enlargements, which was quite a feat. Eric, one of the curators, is an architect so the plans for the hangers was a complex series of foam core strips glued in layers. After completing that assembly I went to the printers to retrieve the prints. They look great at scale, and I think I picked some good pieces for enlargement. I hope so at least.

The rest of the evening was spent doing the final hang, sorting through the pieces and confirming the prices, which ones get rotated and which don't, making sure that they were hanging in the same order they are listed on the price sheets, etc. With 115 pieces it took quite a while and Jessica and I calling the titles back and forth quickly started to sound like a code of some sort: "A 5, 27 6:15 and D 5, 27 8:30 double sided." Anyone listening in was surely mystified by the whole process.


Around 11 Jessica and I called it a night. Tomorrow she will finish hanging the enlargements (we were short a tape measure which caused some issues) and arrange to tables for the reception. I feel a bit guilty leaving her alone to finish it but I will have a full day myself simply driving back and forth between the airports. I have 4 people to collect on 3 flights. My mom arrives at 9:30 at Bush Airport, Kid Flash and Mark at 11:30 at Hobby, and then it's back to Bush to retrieve BFE Michelle at 2:30. Whew!!

By the way, thanks to everyone who has sent me well wishes and who has been checking these updates. My regular hit count has more than tripled in the last few days and I have fielded 40+ emails from members of three different on-line groups that I belong to, and various friends and family members wishing me well or asking for directions or any number of other things. Thanks to you all!

Tomorrow night look for photos from the opening!

The Exterior of the gallery space.


This is the food co-op that shares the performance space during the day. All this gets cleared up and packed away every night. They sell organic and locally grown produce and food related stuff. They had some great prices too!


At the end of the gallery is the stage for the concerts and performances that they do. That's the wall of the gallery with the mounts hanging, waiting for artwork!


The mounts being assembled. It's a very simple mount, just a stack of foam core with a matte board top. The sketches will get clipped into place with binder clips.


Eric and Jessica the curators hanging the mounts on the opposing wall.


The art begins to go up! It's exciting to see it all in place!


Jessica and I finish up the final wall. The whole hang was a small comedy of errors. Miscounting pieces, cutting pieces only to discover that we needed them back in to fill the space, etc. and because the show is hung in chronological order adding or subtracting a piece means that all 115 pieces of paper have to move down the line. >SIGH< It was a long night!

As of 11:30 p.m. all of the pieces are in the space. Tomorrow I retrieve the enlargements from the printers and then they'll get hung, and that's the show!

Meeting the various members of the organization today was interesting. Everyone I met was very young, 25 to 35 at most and a little on the "granola" side. There were lots of dreadlocks about and people wandering through the coffee shop with laptops. Certainly a far cry from the uptight mega-church that I had been imagining. It's quite a relief. During the hang tonight I was talking about who was coming and when I said "my boyfriend" none of them even glanced at me. My nerves about this part of it all at least are smaller.

Tomorrow I make the title cards, hang the blow-ups, arrange the tables for the opening, meet with the DJ about music... it'll be another long day probably!

I arrived in Houston last night, no problems at all. The family that is hosting the first part of my stay (I'll move to a hotel once the family, BF, etc. start arriving) picked me up at the airport and welcomed me. They have what amounts to a hotel room in their garage set up for guests. A double bed, private bath, TV, computer, refrigerator, microwave, coffee pot... no Holiday Inn would have it beat! They are also gracious enough to allow me to borrow one of their cars for the week, which is awesome. Houston doesn't really have a public transport system to speak off, though I'm told that there is a light rail line that runs into downtown. One line. That's the whole thing. For a town this size that seems so odd to me.

this morning I went over to the Gallery for my first taste of the space. The gallery is owned by a church which has always had me worried a little. All I knew was that it was part of a complex, a bookstore, and coffee shop shared part of the space. In my mind I had pictures of a huge sprawling mega-church complex, the likes of which I know exist in Texas. In reality the church complex is a small area in the Montrose District which is one of the artsier areas of town (and apparently home of the annual Gay Pride parade!). Besides the gallery and the bookstore they also run a small farmers market full of organic vegetables. The gallery space is off the coffee shop and is essentially a large white room with a small stage at one end, and around the corner is the little market. (I think/hope that the market gets put away at night, but it isn't terribly intrusive.) The church (from looking at their website seems like a pretty liberal place.

Today I am spending most of the day at a copy center doing some scans and blow-ups of the images to help fill the space a bit. One of the smaller walls will be dominated by 5 2'x3' blow-ups of the some selected sketches. (I hope they hold up at that scale!) By doing the scanning and pre-press work myself I can cut the costs, and get the files turned around a lot faster so that we can get them hung and installed tomorrow.

I'll be posting some photos of the space, and of the process later today, but I thought you'd all enjoy some updates for now.

In roughly a half an hour I will be headed out the door on the way to the airport to catch my flight to Houston. My nerves are really starting to ramp up. Putting the sketches in order last night and doing the final pricing and paperwork I really started to doubt the whole idea of this. These are sketches! Drawings! Doodles! Who wants to see these? Am I just going to be a laughing stock? I know from the comments here and at Flickr that you guys enjoy my sketches, but this is a whole new thing, you know? My nerves are waning somewhat, but I am still a bit worked up. I haven't felt like this in a while! Not since my first theatre shows maybe.

Okay.

I'm breathing.

I'll keep you guys updated on the trip.

The final page in my third sketchbook, and the final image that will be included in the Houston gallery show!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! I'll be headed over to Kid Flash's shortly with a macaroni and cheese pie, deviled eggs, and a cornbread pudding in tow. He's busy making a pear pomegranate pie, and homemade yeast rolls. At 4 we'll be joining his friends for a holiday feast! I can't wait.

Hope all of you have a great holiday. I am very thankful to everyone who reads this little blog, supports my work, comments, emails, cajoles... I love you all.

I understand the concept of regional brands (hence the reason I have to have Duke's Mayonnaise shipped to me) but why is it that I simply CANNOT find certain foods north of the Mason Dixon? I've encountered this problem before... farmers who had no idea why I'd want to buy green tomatoes from their farm stand... no okra in the produce section... no self-rising corn meal... no pimento cheese... for some reason when I was living in Connecticut I couldn't locate walnuts packed in syrup, which is my favorite ice cream topping.

Today's quest? Dill pickle relish. There was sweet relish galore. Something called India Relish (which I assume is another form of sweet relish since the second ingredient was corn syrup) and Hot Dog Relish (some bizarre concoction of relish and mustard it seems). But after checking three stores no one has dill relish? Can some yankee explain to me why this might be?

In preparation for the gallery show I spent the evening removing the pages from my sketchbooks. My poor drawings look so naked and exposed without their covers. This is going to be an interesting show. The gallery sent me the layout for the walls today so I can now clearly see how the show will be put together and what it's all going to look like. I've had a lot of comments requesting that I post photos from the show. Not to worry, I'll keep you guys heavily updated!

I can't believe I've posted more than 160 of these subway drawings. I've been doing this for almost a year and a half and it's still one of my favorite pastimes. Just in time for the gallery show I will be finishing up this sketchbook sometime in the next two or three days. That would make 3 sketchbooks full of subway drawings! When I get back from Houston I'll be starting on my fourth. Whew!

This time next week I'll be packing my bags and heading out to Houston for my gallery show. I have spent the last few days shopping for clothes. I am in a desperate search for JUST the right outfit. I have a few things to live up to here. I am a gay atheist New Yorker who is about to have a gallery show at a faith-based gallery in the heart of a red state. I have to look sharp. Sharp with a slight edge. About a week ago I fell in love with a vest at H&M and decided that I needed to base my outfit around that vest. For the next few days I spent an inordinate amount of time trying to track it down in my size. (Did you know that there are 8 H&M locations in Manhattan? Did you know that only 5 of them carry men's wear? Well you do now.) After nearly giving up I finally braved the 5th avenue Christmas crowds in order to check the last possible location. If you've never shopped 5th avenue at anywhere close to Christmas, let me just tell you that this was tantamount to taking my life into my own hands. Long Islanders and college age girls from New Jersey have no idea how to navigate NYC traffic and tons of them flock to this street at this time of year. Anyway... it worked. I found it! I have my vest, in my size, the base of my outfit is chosen. Now I just have to get the rest of what I want... I already decided that I wanted a solid blue tie, "A Train" blue if you care, and that I wanted to wear jeans and a white shirt. Finding a solid blue tie turns out to be harder than it sounds as well. Macy's, land of 10 million ties, didn't have one. Nor did three other stores that I checked. It took Express for Men (ugh.) to get me the tie. I'm dropping my tux jacket off at the cleaners tomorrow... so the outfit is settled I think.

The gallery has graciously provided me a place to stay, and my host has offered to allow me to borrow a car. I've made all my flight and hotel arrangements for the weekend. I've gathering about a dozen subway maps (for use as decor at the opening, and to probably hang around the gallery, would anyone in Houston know what the NYC subway looked like otherwise?) and I've begun removing the sketches from the books. I bought a corner rounder to clip the square edges of the pages so that they match the precut corners from the books. In some ways a lot to do, in some ways not much.

As it gets closer I'm getting more excited and more nervous as well. It's been a LONG time since I've done this. I get to spend the evening being charming and selling myself as much as my work, something that I've only really had to do in meetings and interviews for the past few years. I know that a lot of people look at my work here, but now they'll be looking at it, with an eye to buy it no less, with me right there in the room. Asking me direct questions about it, Looking at it, and critiquing it within earshot. Wow, just typing that makes me nervous. It makes me even happier to know that I'll have plenty of friends there. It seems I get a new email (or comment!) saying that someone will be at the show everyday.

Yeah. I'm nervous, but I can't wait.

File:008
Catagory: Boyfriend, April 1995 to August 1995
Met: Cast party for "Twelfth Night," AASU
"L" Word: Yes
Age Differential: He-21, Me-23
Signifigance: First "disappearing boyfriend"
Nickname: Puppy
Reason for Break-up: Disappearance

History: Ex 008 and I met at a cast party for a show that BFE Michelle dragged me to. At that particular time 008 was not yet out and so it took a little work that night for me to figure out what was going on. The party was being held in the banquet room of the hotel where Michelle was working at the time. After a long evening of drinking and playing "I Never" (which is great for trying to figure out things about potential dates, by the way), the party broke up and Michelle and I stayed around to do some clean-up. 008 stayed behind as well and the flirting continued until nearly dawn. It was just a few days until 008 and I were dating, and I had seen "Twelfth Night" three more times. We dated for about four months, fairly uneventfully. He and I fell into an interesting routine because I was working third shift, and he was in class. He'd come to my apartment at the end of his day, usually 7 or 8 p.m. and wake me. We'd fool around, or go out briefly until I had to leave for work at 11. He'd usually sleep in my bed while I worked. At 7 a.m. I'd come home and wake him for his classes, we'd have breakfast together and then I'd go to bed. Our relationship was good, but quiet. Towards the end though circumstances stacked up and problems arose. 008 was on the verge of graduating, and unsure of what he was doing afterwards, I was in the middle of a big life shift myself, about to start art school, and moving in with Michelle for the first time. During all this 008 disappeared. For three weeks he stopped returning calls, and even ignored notes left on his car outside the rehearsals of his current show. This is a pattern that would return quite a bit in my life, several later boyfriends would pull similar disappearing acts. After three weeks of absence he showed up on my doorstep teary eyed and apologetic but in the end we decided that the relationship wasn't worth saving. It was one of the most amicable breakups I've ever had.

Current Status:Unknown. After graduation he had decided to attend grad school at the University of Arizona. Google doesn't turn up anything relevant, nor does Friendster or MySpace.

For a few seconds he was perfect, lying on the ground in the middle of Central Park. Sky blue eyes set off by a dark blue sweatshirt, the whole thing contrasted by the red-brown leather color of the oak leaves under his head. There was a tiny touch of golden yellow at his throat, provided by a t-shirt, and just enough haze in the air to soften everything.

I would have killed for my camera, he was so beautiful at that moment. I can't wait for the next moment like that, (and the one after, and the one after...).