Proactive Dating

So I've reached that point again. My dating life goes through cycles, much like everything else. I can be content to be alone for months at a time, often years, and then something will kick into overdrive and I'll decide that it's time to get moving again. I've been sort of feeling around the edges of it for a while now, since before Christmas, but in the last two weeks I've really made a concerted push.

Like a lot of people that pretty much means online dating for me. I mean, I work freelance, so I don't meet people at the office. The few people that I do meet on the job are usually actors, which, while fun for occasionally playing with, haven't often provided me with much in the way of a substantial relationship. Most of my social activities are with straight people for some reason. So online dating it is.

After two weeks of proactive dating, emailing guys, chatting online, and occasionally on the phone, I have three prospects. The Scientist, The Architect, and The Artist. I haven't met any of these guys in person yet, but on paper they seem like decent prospects, though there are a few problems.

The Scientist is great, funny, smart, an atheist... lots of good qualities, but he lives on Long Island. He assures me that he gets into the city quite frequently, but living on Long Island might as well mean that he lives in Ohio. His town is an hour to an hour and a half out on the Long Island Railroad, plus the 30 minute subway ride from Penn Station to my apartment, (assuming he'd be coming here, or me going there). That's quite a haul for a date. So while I'm enjoying talking to him... unless he turns out to be just perfect this is probably going to be a problem.

The Architect is the newest of the prospects, we've only been chatting via email for a few days now. He's a southern boy who knows my hometown well, and even knows my "real" hometown, where I grew up, not just the place I call home. Also cute and funny, with plenty of southern charm left, but... I'm afraid that he might be beyond me in a financial/professional situation. He's a partner in his architecture firm, actually lives in a town in NJ where he has a house, and a very large garden that he enjoys quite a bit, but maintains an apartment here in the city where he lives during the week. He also recently purchased some property on a rather exclusive island not far from my hometown. While all of this is great, and he deserves his success, it intimidates me somewhat. He's 6 years older than me, granted, and has had more time to become an established presence in his field, but in a lot of ways I am just starting out, and certainly won't be buying any property, either here or in GA anytime soon. I hope that this won't be an issue, but it could be.

The Artist is much more like me in the financial/professional regard, a fellow freelancer, in graphic design. He'll probably be the guy I meet first, in fact it may happen tonight. We had talked earlier in the week about getting together tonight for a beer or two, but those plans are still nebulous and may get delayed, since it is getting late in the afternoon and nothing has been decided yet. There aren't any glaring red flags on this playing field so far.

By the way, if one of you is reading this at some point in the future, Hi! Aren't you glad we met/worked through that/got along so well?

3 Response to "Proactive Dating"

  • Kung Fu Twinkie Says:

    Best of luck to you, man. Hope things work out!


  • bohb Says:

    You sound a bit like you are accepting applications for the position of boyfriend at your firm. Too cute, but don't forget to check their references.


  • Jen Says:

    Sooooo. . . did you meet any of them yet?

    I've been teaching a unit on drawing comics, and the kids are doing some really cool things. . .
    Most of them are just so LAZY though. . .unwilling to do ANY research sketches, or even look up photo's to help. . .

    I showed them some of your subway drawings to help them understand the importance of drawing from observation to get realistic details.

    Take care, and good luck with the dating scene!

    Jen